Hope and the way out on the horizon


Life sometimes puts us in situations that challenge us to the extreme.

This can be due to health problems that inflict terrible pain, or to basic needs that cannot be fulfilled, or to people who exploit our lives, or due to many other reasons, unfortunately.

In these circumstances, this suffering cannot be explained completely, only who feels it, knows it. We may feel isolated, because trapped in situations that cause only pain, with no one helping us. We may feel despair, because the people who love us are not able to help us. We may feel abandoned, because not able to find a way forward on our own. We may feel hatred for the people who put us in this bad situation, if someone is the cause of our pain. This is the bad part of life.

What to do when overwhelmed by this suffering and frustration? There is no easy answer, but the core action is to define a set of objectives and keep the focus on them as much as possible. These objectives become the way out on the horizon.

If you are in the middle of the storm of pain, try to keep your eyes open and move toward that way out. As soon as you have a moment of peace for you, try to relax and make this objectives clear to you as much as you can (ask the opinion of people you trust, look outside to find potential solutions, look at your inner-self to understand what are the most important things you need at that stage). So, as soon as the storm comes back, you can focus on your objectives again, and you can do it also when the pain is so overwhelming that you are not able to open your eyes. And even if you get completely lost, you can refocus on your objectives as soon as you feel that a little bit of energy has come back to you.

We need to be realistic; these painful situations can be so extreme that the resources to survive can be found only within the inner self, because it may happen that no helps comes from the outside. But a strategy is needed as well: it is important to know where to focus our energy to be successful and then to take action. These objectives become the foundation of our hope, and can be made stronger and stronger, because they belong to the inner-self only, so no-one and nothing can cancel them; any help that we may receive from the outside is then welcome.

In the book “Brilliant well-being”, the problem of suffering is discussed with examples from real life of people; one of the core principles is that our mind operates between the source of pain and our conscious awareness of this pain; therefore, if we learn how our mind works and we train it using the right methods, all of us can find huge opportunities to improve the situation in any painful contexts  (For more information, see work done at the University of Oxford).

This is the approach of the Centered Life Model: in any circumstances, set up your objectives, validate their consistency with your core-self, assess how they affect your relationship with others, then focus on them and move forward! This is hope; this is the strategy to be successful.

As soon as you are out of the storm, check your objectives again, in order to tailor them to the new circumstances, always toward your best-self.


Many thanks in advance for your comments!



Steps to becoming confident, successful and happy

Brilliant well-being: the life-transforming book


Copyright © – Dimitri Gianesini – All rights reserved

Images under the “Fair Use” policy


4 thoughts on “Hope and the way out on the horizon

  1. Anonymous says:


  2. Anonymous says:

    Hi Dimi,
    I am teary eyes when reading this item about the pain in life. I am so used of pain I had been suffering through my married life to the present. I managed to become patient and silently crying and screaming. I learned how to endured all my pains and sacrifices in life. I am so used of pretending that I am fine though it is not. No one knew despite of all my sweet smile and positive looks they’ve got to me lies the deepest and hurtful pains I am dealing in life. I can inspired so many people here, giving and sharing positive thoughts and advice but in reality I am suffering much pain. Through my pain I’ve learned to widen my FAITH and been so stronger than before. I learned how to fight for right, been so blunt in giving my own side but still with respect, in short I’ve changed my character. I am not that so submissive and become bold of my ideas and right. And I don’t want to be abused anymore.
    Another pain I am dealing again and surviving for 10 years this coming December is my breast cancer. I can no longer hide those painful events in my children and I don’t want them seeing me in my deepest suffering and crying hard. Through this pain in life I owe it much my Faith was widen and been working through my life now… And you made me crying, I always hide myself for what I am dealing today and the coming days remaining to me. But I always pray to be a survivor with my sweetest smile and made me charming… lol that is the main reason when my daughter create my tweeter account and when she ask a name for it, it came to my heart sweetcharm65.instantly. . So day in and day out of life I always offer my sweetest smile and in time when I am alone there pain will attacked me so hard again.Still after this event another time to smile again for GOD will cure me.

    Hope is the only word to use in life and FAITH works for it to handle everything in good hands of our Lord Jesus Christ. May I inspired you a lot Dimi in my short stories in life. Smiling for a new name you’ve given Zits… whatever the meaning of it for you thanks Bro. Have a lovely day always in your day to day life. Thank you my friend!

    • dgianesini says:

      Dear Zita,
      thank you for sharing your experience. With your words and your strength you become a role model for all of us. You teach us how it is possible to overcome the most painful situations that can occur in life and always move forward. Good luck!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s