Love is like jumping in the air for the first time when you are a child: every time you feel love, it is the most exciting flight of your life: it’s energy, it’s passion, it’s joy.
Love is passion, but what happens when you realize that the person you are loving is a real person and not a dream? If you do not accept this person the way he/she is, how can you love him/her? And what if the person you love does not accept the way you are, when he/she understands you are simply a human being?
In this case, you have to recognize reality as it is, and to accept that your dream will blow like a soap bubble, in order to move forward. If you do not do it, your energy will be wasted chasing a dream, and so you risk losing completely your love, because overwhelmed by the anger due to the discovery that reality is not as you wish.
But acceptance does not mean accepting all possible circumstances that make you suffer; acceptance, in this case, means also to have the courage to suffer the pain of leaving situations that do not allow you to express your love.
Even the strongest and purest love ever seen, the love of a mother for her children, needs acceptance; indeed, the greatest expression of this love takes place when the mother teaches her children to be strong and independent, so accepting the fact that one day her children will leave her alone, in order for them to live their own life.
Also accepting the way we are is the only manner to allow us to love ourselves. This does not mean we will never work to improve, this means we will prevent us to hate ourselves when, putting a lot of effort, we are not able to achieve what we want. This will enable the possibility for us to take the needed risks, in order to become really successful, because the fear of failure will disappear.
This is the reason why acceptance is part of the foundation of the Centered Life Model, because acceptance is the foundation of love.
But how can you develop acceptance? This is something that has been discovered by the Buddhist monks after centuries of meditation. As soon as, during your meditation exercises, you sooth your mind and start focusing on the positive attitudes you can express (forgiving, caring, patience and many others) acceptance will grow in you and you will be amazed on how you will start seeing both reality and love from a different perspective.
If you want to start developing and improving acceptance now, you can begin with a very simple exercise. Find a room where you can stay on your own sitting on a chair, then close your eyes and breathe focusing for few seconds on your belly inflating and deflating; then try to imagine situations where forgiving, caring and peace are expressed, feeling the emotion of well-being that follows. If you do this exercise regularly, you will see that, in the normal situations of your life, acceptance will appear more and more as an option for your choices, because you will be driven by the positive emotions acceptance produces.
Many thanks in advance for your comments!
Copyright © – Dimitri Gianesini – All rights reserved
Images under the “Fair Use” policy